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Stop Press! Abramovich To Visit Chelsea

Shock, horror, Roman Abramovich will be flying to Cobham this week. No, he won’t be the one outside with his bed linen because apparently he’ll be going inside our training ground to ‘meet with Carlo Ancelotti’. Imagine that eh? Who’s ever heard of the club’s owner talking to the manager at a training ground? No wonder it’s making the headlines!

Of course, it’s reported as ‘showdown talks’ and whilst I’ve no doubt Roman may well mention our recent form while he’s there, I hardly think his intention is to kick Carlo’s arse.

On top of that, they want us to imagine there’s some kind of international war brewing between Didier Drogba and John Terry. We all know the pair of them have been spotted walking off the pitch having what looked like a less than jovial debate but it’s now allegedly ‘feared the team may develop factions around’ the two players or ‘French speaking and English players’ if our form doesn’t improve.

But whilst the suggestion that defeat today will indeed result in Carlo’s P45 being served is thrown in there, the press boys can’t produce anything when it comes to a replacement, with Pep Guardiola having just agreed a new deal at Barcelona.

I guess they’ll be touting Hodgson for us then?!

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